Aruba 2008

I won, I won, I WON!!!!

Yesterday I put in a comment trying to win a bunch of pregnancy products and I won! This is all thanks to I am so very excited.

Educational Assessments - Eval for initial IEP

My daughter had her first eval yesterday for her IEP. It was an educational assessment, done in a tiny room and it bothered me. Her IEP is going to be late and the pressure is really on right now. Caitlyn turns 3 Dec 20th and this whole process is upsetting me more and more.

After finding out that she will have to have a delay of approax 8 months to qualify for anything I got angry. Why would the county want her to regress? Why not keep providing services so she doesn't fall behind?

During this eval Cait did very well. At one point the administrator stopped asking her questions because they were in the 6 yr old range. Obviously my daughter is doing very well but I heard all the questions and honestly it is typical stuff that any 3 yr old should know.

My question is - How relevant are these tests? I know my little girl is smart but in no way has the intellect of a 6 yr old.

Hearing loss is hard because she really is "normal" when placed in programs that mainly deal with autistic children. This battle is not fun and I have a feeling it is only going to get worse.

Through this I am trying to keep a positive attitude but it is frustrating. Why don't they see this as a real disability? I can see that she has a hard time in noisy situations, a few problems with her articulation and even becomes shy in new environments becuase she doesn't always hear what is going on and knows that there is someething a little different about her.

Thanks for letting me vent. I am lost.

Guess you can call me Bette!

You Are a Bette!

You are a Bette -- "I must be strong"

Bettes are direct, self-reliant, self-confident, and protective.

How to Get Along with Me
* Stand up for yourself... and me.
* Be confident, strong, and direct.
* Don't gossip about me or betray my trust.
* Be vulnerable and share your feelings. See and acknowledge my tender, vulnerable side.
* Give me space to be alone.
* Acknowledge the contributions I make, but don't flatter me.
* I often speak in an assertive way. Don't automatically assume it's a personal attack.
* When I scream, curse, and stomp around, try to remember that's just the way I am.

What I Like About Being a Bette
* being independent and self-reliant
* being able to take charge and meet challenges head on
* being courageous, straightforward, and honest
* getting all the enjoyment I can out of life
* supporting, empowering, and protecting those close to me
* upholding just causes

What's Hard About Being a Bette
* overwhelming people with my bluntness; scaring them away when I don't intend to
* being restless and impatient with others' incompetence
* sticking my neck out for people and receiving no appreciation for it
* never forgetting injuries or injustices
* putting too much pressure on myself
* getting high blood pressure when people don't obey the rules or when things don't go right

Bettes as Children Often
* are independent; have an inner strength and a fighting spirit
* are sometimes loners
* seize control so they won't be controlled
* figure out others' weaknesses
* attack verbally or physically when provoked
* take charge in the family because they perceive themselves as the strongest, or grow up in difficult or abusive surroundings

Bettes as Parents
* are often loyal, caring, involved, and devoted
* are sometimes overprotective
* can be demanding, controlling, and rigid

Painful and confusing

So I went to the dermatologist for a follow-up appointment on my ear. 4 weeks ago they took a biopsy or a bad mole on my ear. A few days later I found out that they had to remove all the skin around it. It hurt like hell and just today the doc pulled out the last of the dissoluble stitches. When I was up the mountains last weekend the cold air really hurt my ear so hopefully the sensitivity will go away soon.

I figured today would just be a normal visit, checking the wound. I spent 45 min in the waiting room getting frustrated but what can I do. When I finally went back to be checked he took another look at my arms. There is a spot that hasn't healed very well in 3+ years (right arm, top, near bend-elbow) so he took a biopsy of that. The biopsy didn't bother me, he injected some stuff to make it numb and a minute later he took the punch out and did a punch biopsy. This took a deep chunk out of my arm about the size of a pencil eraser. It is crazy how much that bled! He stitched it up pretty fast and before I knew it he was attacking my left shoulder. So, right now both of my arms hurt. I have more stitches and I wonder what my future holds.

Feel sick to my stomach... gonna go to bed early.

Dark side

Going there and kinda liking it... if only I posted more than I changed the appearance of this damn thing.


I seem to update facebook and twitter a whole lot more often so check them out if you really want to know what is going on in my life. Let me know if you want the links to either one of them... usually updated pictures on there.

Insomnia is really hitting me. I can't sleep well anymore. Not sure what is going on.

One thing I am excite about is Lake Wallenpaupack this weekend. Going with 13 fine ladies - the festivities will beign Friday night and end Sunday morning. While up there a few of us will be going hiking @ Bushkill Falls. I love being outside and seeing new things. Just need to remember to wear orange! Bow hunting right now. I have been kinda shot before but with a blow dart... hurt like hell. Got stuck in my ass. Gotta love military experiences. Bunch of drunken idiots doing stupid stuff. Maybe some of the stupid fun happenings will take place this weekend.

I am so hungry right now. I know it isn't good to eat this late so I am trying to ignore it.

It is after 11 and I should be going to bed but I know I won't be able to sleep.

What sense does it make to go up there and lay with my eyes open?


I had a strange day. Very slow at work and then I got a pretty exciting call towards the end of the day. Sent my resume out tonight and will have another interview this week. I don't post anywhere else about potential jobs but here so if you are reading this please keep it quiet. :-) On my way home spanky called me telling me that the doc called and my biopsy results are in. I got my docs number and called them back. At the time of the call I was still on a high from the potential job but this certainly burst my bubble. One week ago today I had a suspicious mole on top of my left ear biopsied and got the results today. The woman said there are atypical cells and I need to come in next week to have the rest of it removed. So I have a scheduled appointment for 7:45am on Sept 24th. They mentioned that it was spitzoid and I am having troubles finding any real data on that but I haven't looked all that hard... I think I should just wait.

It is now 10pm and I know I should sleep but just can't. Too much on my mind.

Oh Cait is potty trained!! I am still too nervous about panties at night time but she will be in them by this weekend. She even does well all day at school. I am so very proud of her.

The game is close so I doubt Q will be home at a decent time... shutting down for the night.



Well, I have to admit I am back in my usual spot. Crossroads.

The house is up for sale. Want it to sell fast but I don't know what will happen then. I just want to be with my baby Cait and smile. I love her so very much.

Probably going to sign her up for soccer again this fall. Saturday morning 9am classes. She really enjoyed it and I bet will be even better now.

2 weeks ago I had some issues with her daycare. She has new hearing aids and they sent her to a new room for the afternoon. When I got to her school I saw her aids in her cubby in pieces! Yes, pieces!! They were also wet. As you can tell I was quite pissed. Those aren't cheap. I spoke with the owner and he said it will never happen again but honestly the teachers there suck now. There is no way I will allow her to move up to the next room. That teacher is a complete idiot. She wasn't watching Cait do any of this. When we opened the battery compartment we noticed that both batteries had multiple bite marks... what if she had swallowed one of them??

When I picked her up today there is a new "helper" in her room that had never changed a diaper before Tuesday. How in the hell can they hire someone that has never even changed one? Cait & Tyler refused to let her change them... good thing she is in panties most of the day. That brings me to the next topic -- Potty Training.

She will pee on the potty all day but refuses to poop on it. How do I get her to poop on the potty?!?!?!

There are no more naps. Even found out that she sleeps with her eyes open at times. Later in life she will understand that naps are ok cause you really aren't missing anything!! I want a nap!

Work sucks. They cut half the staff... when I started there were 50 ppl there and now only 24. Last week they made a major cut - I am shocked I made it. Now I have a new boss which is okay but very different. Still unclear on what my new role is. Guess I will find out sometime.

I'm tired. More later.


Did a personality test tonight and got my answers. It actually makes sense.

Thinking about jumping on here again. Once you read my results you will see why I jump from one thing to the next!!

Testing pictures

For Cheryl!

I know it has been a long time since coming on here. I will make sure to take time tonight and give an update!!!

One FIne Spring Day

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My Pink Heart

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Learning new things

Caitlyn had her audiology appointment yesterday. She has one every 3 - 4 months. Thankfully, they started opening them up to Saturdays cause we are typically there 2 hours. We have been going to CHOP since Cait was a baby and that is where they first diagnoised her. They knew something wasn't right before we left the hospital but we didn't officially know till we went to CHOP. It has been a long and sometimes difficult road. Appointment after appointment. She has her audiology appointments every 3 months but has to go in for new ear molds every other month or so. What can I say -- the kids ears grow fast!

So, she did very well at this appointment. It was the first time she didn't have a tantrum or freak out with all the crap that they do. Her therapist has been working with her on Conditioned Response to prepare her for these appointments. Here is the definition of what we went through: Conditioned Play Audiometry (CPA): Generally completed with children approximately 2.5 to 5 years of age. The child is trained to perform a play activity each time a sound is heard. Activities might include putting a block in a bucket, placing a peg in a pegboard, etc. Using this technique, thresholds can be reliably measured for tones of various frequencies. Speech thresholds are typically obtained by having the child identify pictures or repeat words.

Cait did extrememly well with this. She did start to get bored after a little while so her Audiologist kept trying to make it interesting. If you need a good person for your kid Sarah is the best.

Her therapist wasn't able to make it to the appointment but that isn't a big deal. Miss Caity Cait is doing just fine with everything so I am not worried. We did find out that one of her hearing aids isn't producing enough gain so it needs to be sent back. This means she will only have 1 hearing aid till it gets fixed. Oh we are also starting the paperwork to get Cait an FM Receiver. The FM will help when she is on the playground or during story time. I personally don't think that the teachers are ready to use it at her school so that will come at a later time -- once we finally get the damn thing.

I ordered Cait some new Ear Gear tonight: got her the pink/purple flowers. She already has the orange/red ones. These are for soccer.

I mentioned that I will be a soccer mom in the previous post. She starts March 22nd and goes every Saturday. This gives us a month to start her skills! I am positive she will have a great time running around the field and kicking balls. Well, she kicks her dad in the balls all the time and loves it so this should follow suit.

Soccer Mom

I have gone off the deep end and signed my kiddo up for soccer. She starts next month and now all I need is a damn minivan.

Locked down

No freaks, weirdo's and even "normal" people will be reading this unless you are granted permission! I have been neglecting the blog for quite some time now. Life has been up and down. Probably more down than up. I am going to try to turn that around and get back on track.

A month ago I started a new job and it has totally been kicking my ass. Some days I don't even have time to pee... I know that sounds hard to believe but when you are scheduled as tight as 15 minute increments it makes it hard.

Caitlyn has been doing really well. Even though her routine has changed at home she hasn't skipped a beat. The girl keeps me on my toes. She is very determined with everything she does. Honestly she is what keeps me going. I never thought I could love anyone so much. Of course she gets on my nerves but I try to remember that she really isn't evil -- just a 2 yr old! ha

Right now Quang is away on business. He has been gone since Sunday and shockingly the house is clean and there have been no issues. Well, Cait got a cough and slept with me last night but that isn't anything major. She did most of the sleeping, I got to lay there and dodge elbows, fists & feet. At one point I thought for sure she cracked one of my ribs. Tonight even though she cried for a minute I made her sleep in her room -- I NEED SOME SLEEP tonight!!

Crap, I forgot I started laundry. Need to finish it before I pass out. The damn cat is psycho right now. She is running from room to room. Meowing. Running. Meowing. Possessed.


To be continued....